judgementkazzy | inbox//recolle;

[ majima shakes his head. if only he had as much confidence in himself and kiryu does. ]

No. But we both know I ended up with your card.

[ Kiryu believes in Majima, that's all there is to it. ]

Something else must have happened.

[ He nods. If Majima doesn't remember the rest, then it's just as likely that he didn't kill him. ]

Do you think you could have killed him?

[ majima closes his eyes, takes a lot drag of his cigarette. ]

My brother killed someone here, you know. Where things are normal. Where we aren't neck deep in gang drama. If he could do that here, then, why wouldn't I be capable of that? Especially if I was part of a gang as intense as the yakuza.

[ Kiryu doesn't look away. He knows there's logic to what Majima's saying, but also... ]

That's your brother. [ It's a sensitive subject, he knows that. ] You told me what my dad did doesn't change who I am.

[ Kiryu doesn't care if Majima's brother is a killer or not, basically. It's scary, and the yakuza aren't known for playing nice. ]

Whatever we were involved with, you're right. We might both have been killers. But do you think you would have killed him?

It's not that simple, Kazzy. The shit that happened with my brother, if it weren't for me...

[ but kiryu moves on, asking that follow up question so he just lets it go. if it weren't for him goading his brother on, he wouldn't be in jail. if it weren't for him always wanting one more thrill, they could've maybe chilled out as they got older. it's sad how novel the concept of growing older together feels. ]

I don't know.

[ majima can't know, not when every day for the last three years he's berated himself for the poor decisions he made in the past. like every move he makes is the wrong one, like he can't trust himself to do the right thing. how could he be trusted with that man's life? ]

[ Kiryu nods, humming his agreement. He can't know, that much is true. Neither of them can really say they got into this expecting what they got. Whatever honor they might have had as yakuza, they were definitely still criminals. It's impossible to say what they could or couldn't do. ]

What happened with your brother?

[ Majima's never talked about his brother's arrest before, and Kiryu wouldn't press if it didn't seem like he wanted to talk about it. ]

[ mostly, he doesn't like talking about it for the reasons he'd told kiryu before - they're not secrets, they're just not other people's problems. but kiryu's his boyfriend now. and he might as well talk about it now before they get too deep into this and kiryu realizes majima isn't good enough for him. ]

We were a couple of idiots, back then. I was always so full of fuckin' energy, kinda like Mafuyu.

[ a lot like mafuyu, but without the memory of a fish issue. ]

So we were always lookin' for he next thrill. Started out small, like palmin' a pack of candy we couldn't afford at 7/11. An' then it got bigger, flashier. Wallets, big ticket items. Tried not to hurt anyone. My brother's a big guy, just, really fuckin' huge. No one wants to fight a guy like that, not if they can avoid it.

After I graduated from high school it got worse. I'd been cuttin' class a lot even before that, 'cause my brother's a couple years older than me. Neither of us could find steady work, especially not work that paid as much as we were making liftin' shit. I started fightin' for money, then, too.

It was always about the thrill, though. And I always wanted more. Wanted to get better at it, jack better stuff. My brother, he... [ majima considers this ] he was never against it, he needed the money, too. Ya turn 18 and the orphanage doesn't really give a shit what happens to you after that, 'specially if you wasted 18 years worth of resources not gettin' adopted into a nice happy family. But he probably wouldn't have done it, if it weren't for me always wanting more.

Cops would catch us, sometimes. But nothing much happened. They didn't have enough evidence, or it was more trouble than it was worth for somethin' small, or, shit, I don't know. Just ended up with a slap on the wrist. Makes you feel invincible after awhile.

[ he laughs morosely. the invincibility clearly hadn't lasted ]

So one day, we've agreed to hit this convenience store. It was gonna be simple, just in and out. My brother was going to ask them for cash, get it, and leave. Only, the clerk put up a fight and a couple people joined in. I told ya my brother's big as fuck, though, right? And we were fightin' all the time back then, and these guys were just some randos. They didn't know how to throw a punch, most likely. In the fight, he injured two of the guys real bad and killed the third. The charge was extra steep 'cause he was robbing them.

[ majima can't claim to really understand how that one works, but it is what it is. ]

He wouldn't've even gone, if it weren't for me. And I wasn't there -- it should've been me instead of him.

[ Kiryu listens. It's nothing like his life, nothing like the love of his parents or his time in college. Majima may as well be from a different world.

But Kiryu listens and he thinks of Mafuyu and his own memories. Of guys who like to fight and wreak havoc and have fun. Maybe it's not his style, but he could understand it someday. Majima's circumstances were completely different from his, it's no surprise they would have different lives. ]

What kept you from being there?

[ Kiryu won't say they were just kids, or that they clearly learned the error of their ways far too late. If there's one thing Kiryu is good at, it's not judging people. He knows Majima's good deep down, this is just more of what makes up who he is. ]

I don't know, we thought it was gonna be simple. That it wouldn't take both of us. I'd just pick him up after. But he never showed up.

[ it's a stupid reason for him not to have been there, he knows that. but they'd both been so sure at the time. it had made sense. all of it had made sense, until it didn't anymore. ]

[ It makes a lot of sense, even if arguably, Majima didn't really have any of the blame for their job going south. Sure, they could've not done crime, but it obviously wasn't an alternative either of them had considered then. Their circumstances had more to do with what happened.

Or maybe Majima really did fuck up and he's trying to turn his life around now that his brother is in jail for the foreseeable future. Either way makes sense. He's quiet for a pause, running through what he should say and what would actually be genuine concern.

Genuine always wins out with Kiryu. ]

I'm sorry about your brother.

Thanks.

[ he's not bothered by the response, he knows it's the best kiryu can come up with. it's not like kiryu can absolve him of his guilt or anything. ]

[ Okay, now Kiryu reaches over to try and take Majima's hand. Learning more about him doesn't change how he feels about him. He already knew Majima was trying to atone and save up money to help his brother. Now it all makes more sense. ]

Thanks for telling me.

[ majima looks a little confused but lets kiryu take his hand. it's nice, that kiryu still wants to do that. ]

That's not somethin' ya gotta thank me for.

[ These are things you do with your boyfriend, Majima!!! Gosh.

Kiryu's response is just a shrug as he shakes his head. ]

Still. Thanks.

[ He figures it can't have been easy. ]

I wish we had better answers for this shit. Maybe we should write everything down and keep track of it together. Since we're connected.

[ ~~connected~~ in a special way ]

That's a good idea. We can see what things overlap.

[ They share a deep connection, after all. ]

I can go get some paper, if you want. Might have a notebook or two we could use.

That's a good idea, you should do that.

One sec.

[ He steps back into the apartment and returns with a plain notebook and two pens. ]

Here, you write on that side, I'll write on this one?

Wouldn't it be easier to just talk about them, an' you can write 'em down as we go?

Oh, I guess so, sure.

[ Kiryu sits down and pockets one of the pens. His handwriting is pretty neat, after all. ]

What's the first thing you remember?

There was a blind girl. And I was helping her through a city, running away from some assholes.

[ he thinks about this for a moment ]

Probably yakuza fuckers, I guess.

Makes sense.

[ Majima hadn't mentioned the blind girl... but he writes it down anyway. ]

The first thing I remembered was kind of weird, I went on a date with a girl from a call center? [ He'll write that down anyway. ] But then there was that guy on the roof who had all those tattoos. He had an eyepatch, and he ripped his shirt off so that we could fight.

[ He pauses. ]

Actually, I remembered more of that conversation, later. He told me he just wanted to have fun and run amok in the city, and that he only listened to people who were strong. [ He's a badass, in other words. ] I remembered fighting him again, maybe two years later? He was really happy. I was too.

I think I was friends with him.

Edited 2017-06-17 19:55 (UTC)

Well, ya fight tigers. So, you know.

[ they'd talked about it before. that someone who wanted to fight would of course want to fight someone who fought tigers. ]

I think it's safe to assume we were both in Japan, considerin' your card and the fact we can speak Japanese again. I was usin' a pager? So I guess it was probably the 80s or the 90s, right?

[ that seems like a safe assumption. ]

I don't know shit about eyepatch guy, but there's the girl I hauled through town, white suit guy who looked... kinda like Ken Watanabe in that super boring movie about the dreams, and some guy named Daigo.

[ Kiryu nods, writing down "Japanese. 80s? Early 90s?" ]

Wow, I'd only heard about pagers from my parents.

[ Not really the most important thing here, obviously. ]

Oh, the white-suited guy I remembered was kind of young. He had a really smug look to him, it must have been a different guy. [ He'll go ahead and write this down too. "Guys in white suits: Ken Watanabe?? + Young Asshole-looking dude." ]

Daigo? [ Had the guy on the roof said anything about Daigo? Or was that during their cage match? ] I think the eyepatch guy mentioned him, too. We were both talking about him and some kind of resort deal in Okinawa?

[ Which makes no sense but he writes that down as well. ]

I remembered some stuff about Kamurocho, too.

Okinawa...

[ he says it like he's trying to figure out if he has the same feeling he gets about the city with the blind girl when he says it, but it doesn't feel like it. ]

So we've got some shitty town, and Okinawa, and Kamurocho. What'd you remember about Kamurocho?

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